Happily Ever After

I watch with fascination as my two-year old daughter falls under the spell of “The Princesses.”  Her face lights up when speaking of Cinderella, Belle and Snow White; they have become her dear friends and the plots of their tales enter frequently into family conversations. This caught me a bit by surprise – the image of wasp-waisted, simpering heroines in need of rescuing by a prince would not have been my first choice as role-models for my daughter. As cloying as the film versions of these young ladies can sometimes be, I tried to cultivate a beginner’s mind and re-enter into the “princess world,” which I had also enjoyed as a child, to try to understand why these fairy tales are so endearing and enduring.

The thread that ties these young ladies together and gives verity to their royal heritage is that their characters do not change with their circumstances. While in the midst of their trials, they have little cause to believe that things will get better, but their faith in the basic goodness in life does not waver and they are kind to those above and below them throughout their stories.

Cinderella and Snow White try to please their cruel step-mothers despite their irrational demands. Belle (Beauty) willingly, and without complaint, trades her comfortable family life to live with the Beast in his enchanted castle. These girls have self-possession of spirit that is resolute under duress. Whether or not the Prince appeared, one feels that we could comfortably leave these young ladies to further mature under this discipline, but - happily, they are rewarded by their forbearance by union with their "true love," or their higher nature. 

The first time my daughter watched the Cinderella movie, she did not know that the "happy ending" was coming - she was right there with Cinderella - experiencing sadness as her stepsisters ripped her dress and as she cried in despair of ever being able to attend the ball. This is our life experience - we don't know how things will end up, but having faith that a “happy ending” is around the corner can help us to be fully open to each emotion as it happens. By taking good care of ourselves in the present moment we allow a future free from unresolved emotional stiffness. Being open to the present is critical to recognizing the appearance of our “fairy godmother” or Divine guidance. Sometimes we are in such a hurry to get to the end, or at least to a place where we feel “safe” that we forget the freedom and potential in “not knowing.”

The stepmother and sisters try to control their emotions – their envy of Cinderella’s beauty - by putting their feelings in an ashy corner along with Cinderella. Their inability to contend honestly with their grasping and jealous dispositions lost them the Prince, or contact with their innate Divine nature. In the Charles Perrault version of Cinderella, the stepsisters beg for forgiveness, which is granted, but in the Grimm’s Brothers Ashenputtal, after the heroine unites with the Prince, the sisters still scheme against her, and are blinded as a punishment (forced to turn inward in the harshest possible way).

In addition to hardships, before she can be united with her Prince, Snow White must "die" to the world as she knew it to "awake" to everlasting happiness. She swallows the poisoned apple given to her by what appears to be an old woman in need. The eating of the apple is her last trial – Snow White must rid herself of sensual desire to be born into her true nature. In the Grimm’s Brothers version, as the King’s son removes her in her glass coffin, she is bumped, and coughs up the apple; her soul journey now complete.

Belle, or Beauty, is an intellectual and an aspirant. While her sisters squandered their childhood with frivolous pursuits (in the Madame de Villeneuve book version), she prepared herself by diligent study for the test of transforming the Beast (material nature) to a Prince (soul nature).

 “The Princesses” and I are now at peace as I realize that they have been responsible for their own redemption. Their sustained spiritual efforts have made themselves worthy of being united with the higher spiritual realm. I am realizing that fairy tales are indeed the appropriate vehicle to acquaint my little soul with important life lessons in patience, strength, cheerfulness, faith and good-heartedness in the face of despair. I think that my “little princess” would agree!

Resources and Recommendations:

A good resource for variant versions of classic fairy tales as well as in depth thematic commentary can be found at:  http://www.surlalunefairytales.com/